Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Ugh high kick is my life these days!
<33
why is it so cute and funnyyy?!!
ep77 <3
11:30 PM
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Omg, it is identity crisis.
Wikipedia:According to Erikson's stages, the onset of the identity crisis is in the teenage years.
Erikson suggested that people experience an identity crisis when they lose "a sense of personal sameness and historical continuity"WORD
8:38 PM
Its so hard to explain how i feel.The past seems like a past life and the present just feels like..the present.Maybe its because i like to live in the moment thati try not to think about my life before.Its not that i try not to think about it, but i guess you could sayi try not to dwell on it?Well this just makes me look bad.Basically im not saying i wish to forget what everything was before,but it feels like a dream i had and i'd nvr led that life.(I dont think many can understand what im saying, its not what many people go through)But the memories are clear and i know, obviously that its not a dream.This might all sound negative and reflect me as a bitch whoshould be ashamed but that's not howi mean it to be.I've been trying to voice my feelings but its so hard to put it out.And now that i have, it sounds like im some self loathing past despising bitch.But its not.I wish this nvr happened, because im curious to knowhow my life would be different.But im also glad it happened because i do like life right now.Although many times i've felt that i would be somewhat happier if i stayed.Many times.I feel like 2 different identities.When i reflect on the past, it just all feels so far away.and i hate it.I hate that im losing grip of my life before.It hasnt been long, i know.But here its a completely different worldand i am adapting so fast it feels like i've lived here my whole life.akwlejfnvsdkfjbnThis is how i feel, simply put.I feel like if i nvr left, i would genuinely be a very happy person.But being here, i feel like i am myself.Then i get confused, what is myself?Who i was before? or who am i now?i still feel like the same person..but yet somehow different..Or not.FUCK.So tell me, how many people go through this shit?Not playing victim but fuck, if you did, counsel me.This is almost like...identity crisis.
8:05 PM
Friday, January 1, 2010
So its finally 2010.
Its hard to explain but this year flew by yet at the same time felt ridiculously long.
I am content to leave 2009 behind and start this motherfucking new year.
Another decade just like that.
Tried to decide on a new year resolution but for once this time,
i couldn't make up my mind not because of the jitter hesitation between the many options
but because i didn't really have anything i really wanted to achieve.
I mean there are things i want to accomplish of course, but not the new year resolution kind.
...if you know what i mean.
But i decided if i cant come up with anything i'll stick to the cliche and make my new year resolution eating healthy.
I mean, might as well right.
Well besides that, countdown was fun.
For some reason it was kind of emotional for me.
I mean nothing big happened to me personally this year, but yet the interchanging from 2009
to 2010, that split second, i was overwhelmed.
Thoughts ran in my head, and emotions pulsed through my mind and body.
Cant quite say what it was cuz i dont even know what it was, but overwhelmed would
sort of put it somewhere in place.
I wish i could describe it better but its one of those things
where you know nothing you say or write out will come even close to expressing how you felt.
Although it hit me pretty hard and i think im gonna look back at that moment maybe even tomr
and think about what it was.
Why are we so complicated.
UGH! i have the freakin hiccups.
My second session this DAY this ones going longg and its starting to poke my ribs.
im gonna knock out nowww.
Kinda excited to wake up tomr to jan 1 2010, although technically it is already
but the day has yet to begin because its 4.44am and its dark and everyones asleep
so it doesnt really count.
Haha Happy New Years everyone!
I really hope 2010 will be better year, for me and for you guys too.
Gnight!<3
4:15 AM
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Ugh high kick is my life these days!
<33
why is it so cute and funnyyy?!!
ep77 <3
»11:30 PM
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Omg, it is identity crisis.
Wikipedia:According to Erikson's stages, the onset of the identity crisis is in the teenage years.
Erikson suggested that people experience an identity crisis when they lose "a sense of personal sameness and historical continuity"WORD
»8:38 PM
Its so hard to explain how i feel.The past seems like a past life and the present just feels like..the present.Maybe its because i like to live in the moment thati try not to think about my life before.Its not that i try not to think about it, but i guess you could sayi try not to dwell on it?Well this just makes me look bad.Basically im not saying i wish to forget what everything was before,but it feels like a dream i had and i'd nvr led that life.(I dont think many can understand what im saying, its not what many people go through)But the memories are clear and i know, obviously that its not a dream.This might all sound negative and reflect me as a bitch whoshould be ashamed but that's not howi mean it to be.I've been trying to voice my feelings but its so hard to put it out.And now that i have, it sounds like im some self loathing past despising bitch.But its not.I wish this nvr happened, because im curious to knowhow my life would be different.But im also glad it happened because i do like life right now.Although many times i've felt that i would be somewhat happier if i stayed.Many times.I feel like 2 different identities.When i reflect on the past, it just all feels so far away.and i hate it.I hate that im losing grip of my life before.It hasnt been long, i know.But here its a completely different worldand i am adapting so fast it feels like i've lived here my whole life.akwlejfnvsdkfjbnThis is how i feel, simply put.I feel like if i nvr left, i would genuinely be a very happy person.But being here, i feel like i am myself.Then i get confused, what is myself?Who i was before? or who am i now?i still feel like the same person..but yet somehow different..Or not.FUCK.So tell me, how many people go through this shit?Not playing victim but fuck, if you did, counsel me.This is almost like...identity crisis.
»8:05 PM
Friday, January 1, 2010
So its finally 2010.
Its hard to explain but this year flew by yet at the same time felt ridiculously long.
I am content to leave 2009 behind and start this motherfucking new year.
Another decade just like that.
Tried to decide on a new year resolution but for once this time,
i couldn't make up my mind not because of the jitter hesitation between the many options
but because i didn't really have anything i really wanted to achieve.
I mean there are things i want to accomplish of course, but not the new year resolution kind.
...if you know what i mean.
But i decided if i cant come up with anything i'll stick to the cliche and make my new year resolution eating healthy.
I mean, might as well right.
Well besides that, countdown was fun.
For some reason it was kind of emotional for me.
I mean nothing big happened to me personally this year, but yet the interchanging from 2009
to 2010, that split second, i was overwhelmed.
Thoughts ran in my head, and emotions pulsed through my mind and body.
Cant quite say what it was cuz i dont even know what it was, but overwhelmed would
sort of put it somewhere in place.
I wish i could describe it better but its one of those things
where you know nothing you say or write out will come even close to expressing how you felt.
Although it hit me pretty hard and i think im gonna look back at that moment maybe even tomr
and think about what it was.
Why are we so complicated.
UGH! i have the freakin hiccups.
My second session this DAY this ones going longg and its starting to poke my ribs.
im gonna knock out nowww.
Kinda excited to wake up tomr to jan 1 2010, although technically it is already
but the day has yet to begin because its 4.44am and its dark and everyones asleep
so it doesnt really count.
Haha Happy New Years everyone!
I really hope 2010 will be better year, for me and for you guys too.
Gnight!<3
»4:15 AM
I realized how fun it is to look back on past happenings. So for future's sake, here we go